Yarn reality frustrations

I have a lovely book (bought on clearance even!) for very simple but classy sweaters. I have lovely yarn, in great colors, waiting to be used on the right pattern. I blissed out for a few days, thinking that the combination of yarn and pattern would not only whittle down the stash, but would knit up quickly and look fabulous on me! Reality hit when I started a swatch.

Patterns always tell you to check your gauge. Knitters always tell you to check your gauge. My mother tells me to check my gauge. I've already posted about a sweater disaster that was the result of not doing what I'm told. But I just have grouse a bit about this...

The yarn and the pattern I've selected never seem to match. Never. I've fiddled with needle sizes, I've been careful to buy a yarn similar to the one suggested in the pattern, my stitches are neither too loose nor too tight. I think it's a plot to get me to buy more yarn than I already have stashed. If nothing else works, I'll go out and buy the exact yarn used in the pattern, right? Grr.

I'm sure someone with more experience could calmly explain that I am missing something important that just makes it all work out okay. Or maybe they can't and I just have bad gauge luck. After the brown disaster sweater, I'm not ready to hop into another large project without being absolutely sure of myself.

I'll try once more (with one more needle size) to work out this white mohair boatneck that i'd love to wear this summer. If I get too frustrated, I'll go back to felting. It's only a little unpredictable (I don't felt swatches, and different colors can shrink differently), and it hides a myriad of little oopses. Just my style.

My stoop

I know I complain about my bad neighbors, late night drunken party traffic and a serious lack of lawn. But when we move from this apartment, I can honestly say I will miss our front stoop. The paint is chipping, the steps are warped, and it offers a limited view up the walkway of a street light, some chain link fence, and pavement.

It does have a roof, which can make it a nice place from which to watch and listen to rain and thunderstorms. At night, you can sit in relative darkness and watch the world go about its quiet way... dog walking, couples holding hands, evening runners. You can usually see the Big Dipper from the stoop, and sometimes Orion's Belt. Time moves a bit more slowly when you're perched on the steps out front.

I sit there for lunch, often in the sun which beats down on the steps spring through fall. Today I ate almost an entire container of the sweetest grape tomatoes while reading a cold war spy novel - it's summer on the stoop alright. I closed my eyes in the sun, heard a lazy bumble buzzing around the garden, smelled flowering trees on our street. The steps themselves smell of summer - worn, dry wood and the hot metal of the nailheads - a dusty, metallic smell. I knew they'd be warm enough to burn my bare feet a bit when I finally went into the house. I shook my iced tea glass, just to hear the ice clink and settle. Time moves very slowly on the stoop. I'm going back there after work.

Don't boss me

I am a big fan of the phrase "you're not the boss of me!". Used by my father so many years ago (not without some consequences, I'm sure), it is a family favorite. I say it to my Better Half, I say it to my friends, the weather... I even say it to myself!

Sometimes though... sometimes it's good to have a boss. My boss for the last five years began as an interim boss. Things did not work out well, and he continued to fill in until the "interim" was dropped. But he's done at the end of June... and the search to fill the position has failed (again). So... no Boss.

No Boss, no plan for how to tackle next year. I won't have a summer to bring someone up to speed on our operating budget, the interesting patchwork of funding that keeps us afloat and keeps our 25-30 full time folks paid. A plan for equipment and technology replacement? Nope. A leader's input and implementation assistance with a new model of program budget management? Nope. Staff needs? Huh-uh. I promised my staff we'd have a planning retreat when the new Boss was hired. I still owe them a retreat, but I feel horrible that that time will be spent on more "surviving in leadership limbo" conversations. I love my coworkers - we could do great things together. We already do, but it could be better and more rewarding. How do you operate in a hierarchical system when one of the crucial pieces is missing?

I'm tired of getting no supervision, and not being able to implement long term plans. I think I'm experiencing a form of atrophy because I'm unable to provide a Boss with the benefit of my experience. And there's not a darn thing I can do about it.

I've got to go. When I turn off this computer, I'm going to take my kitchen store gift certificate and spend it on something completely impractical. Retail therapy might not make me feel better, but I'm willing to take a crack at it. And then I'm going to go home and have some wine and whine a bit to the Better Half. He will be sympathetic, he always is. He will remind me that the upcoming Memorial Day makes a long weekend, and that life is not just work. And then he'll do something good (like the laundry), hug me, and I'll be able to be satisfied with the status quo for just a bit longer.

Burlington Update

Okay, I got some sleep, and I'm a little bit more like my normal self.

Burlington was fun, and it was really wonderful to see everyone again. It had been way too long since Alex and I had seen each other, and I hope it isn't that long 'til I see him again. And Alex? Of course I'd come again! I apologize again for my hasty departure, and my lack of energy. By the time I left, my wheels had fallen off (ask Mark about that some day) and I just needed to get on the road. And a loooong road it was. It didn't seem that long on the way over...

Unfortunately, we will have to wait and see if Steve got any pictures over the weekend, because I left my camera battery at home in the charger. I can't go anywhere without forgetting one crucial part of my plan.

Got to see Lake Champlain, which I haven't seen in nine years. It's such a beautiful place. We went to a few bookstores, and that second used bookstore we went to? The huge one? What's that called? I think that that place alone will convince Mark to come with me next time. I could lose him in there for days. We had lots of good food, including Alex's excellent Sh*t waffles. Oh, Alex? The Poke Method of testing done-ness in a steak is actually a legitimate method, as you can read here. And even though for some reason every yarn store in Vermont is closed on Sunday, Kate and Steve came through in the end, and took me to the local Ben Franklin, which by the way, is nothing like our crappy one. They had a really great and unexpected yarn selection. I ended up buying more Cherry Tree Hill Yarn, and some Crystal Palace Panda Wool.

All in all, it was worth the trip, and I'm so glad I went. Thank you all again!

Home

I made it home alive. I got home about a quarter to eight, and I was asleep not long after. I have to say that the next time I make that trip, it should be for at the very least one day longer. All that driving is pretty tough for an over-nighter. Thank you all so much for your hospitality, and I apologize for not being a little more lively. Like I said all that driving...

I'm going back to bed, 'cause I'm on vacation and I can do that. More later...

Lack of Knitting Posts

I haven't posted much about knitting lately. I really should, since it's in the title. (This may not make some of my non-knitting friends and readers happy, but as soon as they accept that it's all about me, everything will be fine.) It's not because I'm not knitting, because I am. I'm just too lazy to take pictures and post them. I'm on vacation next week, so maybe I can come up with an FO or two. Right now I'm making boring old stockinette socks in anything but boring Lorna's Laces Black Pearl. I didn't think the Lorna's Laces yarn would knit up into anything I would like, but it surprised me and is knitting into a beautiful fabric. Sometimes I just need to knit something without a pattern. Now is one of those times. I'm also copying a few other people in blogland who have made or are making afghans out of mitered squares of sock yarn. I have no time table for this, since I have a limited supply of extra sock yarn and a limited budget to buy more sock yarn, so I suspect this will be a loooooong project. I'm heading over to Burlington in the morning, so there might be some new yarn when I get back. Maybe some travelling knitting pictures too. See you soon!

...speed update...

Kate's world on high speed summary (if that's at all possible for her). Pictures to follow later.

Before: Better Half with a moustache and beard (as I met him) / After: Better Half with a naked face. Week-long freakout when I see a stranger in my house wearing my husband's clothes.

Before: Another summer with cute 'n sassy chipmunk, answers to the name Pimpmunk, highly entertaining to entire apartment building / After: Smear on the driveway next door. Immortalized in my flower garden by the upstairs neighbors. Broken pottery shard headstone says RIP Pimpmunk.

Before: Reasonably tidy house / After: Warm weather and cold weather clothes half packed and unpacked (and strewn everywhere) because the stupid weather won't make up its mind.

Before: Sharp sticks and scraps of wool / After: Felted chicken that fits in my hand. It's wee, and I knit it with nary a pattern!

Before: Seemingly endless days of bachelor living with cats / Soon to come: Kate and Heather together at Alex's house. Bwaa haa haaaaaa.

My Crazy, Pedalling Cross Country for A Good Cause Neighbor

On Wednesday, our neighbor Pete is embarking on a cross country bike trip to raise money for Project Chicken in Nicaragua - a program that provides rural families with food and income. His non-profit organization is called Wheels for Change, and he is part of a two man bicycling adventure to raise funds and awareness in support of this branch of Partnerships in Health.

Taking a northern route from Ocean Park, Maine to Seattle, Washington the guys expect 40 or so days of fun filled pedalling. I'll be checking their website for photos and updates, as they adjust to over a month of greeting the same bike seat every day, spending so much quality time together, camping, limited bathing, granola bars and ramen noodles, and relying on the kindness of others.

Best of luck and swift wheels!